April Scowlers

Last week was a total disasterous nightmare of epic proportions.

First of all, I’m pulling double-duty with my boss gone squeezing a kid out. So now my other co-worker Beth and I are stretched so thin, you can practically see through us. (Well, you can see through me anyway. Beth is too thick to see through—and moves at the pace of a snail’s ass.) I’ve been here till like seven most nights last week and they’re not even paying us any more to do this extra work. I’d complain to HR, but then I’d just have to file more paperwork. I'm totally miserable. That kid better come out soon or I'm gonna reach in there and get the little brat myself.

I barely have time to blink let alone drink (although I have been making time for it!) In fact, Dwayne and Wayne turned me onto two buck chuck at the Trader Joe’s. Cheap wine for me to drink after a long, hard day of work. Not a bad way to go.

This weekend was a blast….me and Karen went to Zack’s place for a little BBQ. It was great to blow off some steam with those guys. Zack’s friends are nuts. And Tiff made up a new liver disease: Toxic Shot Syndrome! She says it’s when you drink so much you throw up blood. LOL!

I swear. . .I never know what she’ll say next!

To Our Friend: Mary Wanna

Dudes!

Happy 420 to all my bros!

I've been so crazy at work this week, I haven't even had to blink. My boss is gone for a while while she pops a kid out, so myself and another co-worker have been charged with filling her shoes. I got the GIANT shoe, i think. All Beth does is fuckin eat tic tacs and complain about how shitty her haircut is.

NEWSFLASH: SHUT UP!

I've been workin my ass off all week and I swear, I don't even think she's even checked her voicemail, she's too busy bitching.

Anyway, I've been so bushed when i get home, I just pop a beer and hit the sack. I haven't seen anyone this week and I miss you guys! Even the old ball & chain! haha!

But tonight's the night we've been waiting for! 4/20! We're gonna have a friggin blast. And MAN do i need it after the week I've had!

MOLLY MALONES, HERE WE COME! Right after we visit Mary Jane! HA! lok at that--it's almost exactly 4:20 on 3/20! LOL!

Weekend at Blarney's

I was finalloy well enough to go to work on Friday, but I still wasn't 100%, so I just took it easy and went home pretty early. My boss is going out on leave this week, so I had to get a ton of stuff done for her before she pops her kid.

We didn't get everything done, so I went home and zonked out on Friday (after another vodka-ale) and on Saturday, I had to drive all the way to Woodland fuckin Hills to meet with Pat to finish the hand-off. She's only going to be gone a month, but me and my coworker need to step up and help guide things while she's gone. So we had to finish going over everything and Zack said he knows some bar up there, so we all car-pooled and I dropped them off at Blarney's Cove.

The place looked awesome from the outside, so I was anxious to get my shit done with Pat. It only took two hours to finish. My boss is cool, but kind of a control freak, so she had to explain everything to me fifteen times, like I'm some kind of idiot. I mean, i've worked for her forever, she knows she can trust me. But she still freaks out. I think she's just worried about becoming a mom....but she'll be a good one. Lots of nagging! lol!

Anywya, after my meeting, I met up with Karen, Zack & Tiff at the Blarney cove. By thte time i got there, Tiff was already drunk as hell and Zack was right behind her. Me and Karen were the only two sober ones in the place, i think! IT was a total british pub theme....really cool. It made me feel like an old brit! I kept smacking zack on his head like I was benny hill, and Tiff kept shoving her boobs at the bartender shouting, "KISS MY BLARNEY COVES!" lol!

Shits & Giggles

Dudes,

It's like this week has been raining shit. And i have a diarreah umbrella. Actually, my stomach's been bugging me all week and i've been hauling ass (so to speak) to the bathroom like once an hour. I don't wanna be too gross, but it's been a tough few days.

Wayne dropped by last night with some soup (Thanks Bro!). I don't know what's wrong with me, but today's the first day i can be out of bed without wanting to die.

On top of it all, my boss is out of maternity leave starting this week, and I was supposed to do a bunch of shit for her, so i'm probably going to wind up having to go in this weekend if I feel up to it.

SUCKs.

It all started Monday night, when me, Tiff, Zack and Kar went out to dinner. I think i had some bad pasta primavera. Zack called it pasta primavomit when it arrived--i should have known somethin was up! I think he cursed me! He had it too and has been down all week. Tiff dropped him off at my place yesterday and all day we just layed around on the sofas watching shitty movies on tv.

Between Tiff & her computer virus and Zack and his real virus...I'm starting to think i should keep away!

But never fear, bros and broettes! Zack had the great idea of adding some vodka to the ginger ale we've been using to help settle our stomachs. Just a little shot to keep my goals in check. It's weird being sick with a buzz...it really didn't help my case at all, but at least i'm still on track, ya know?

Karen's coming over to check on me and bring me some lunch in a few. Isn't she just the best??

Easter Eggselence!

Zack and Tiff had a little Easter Gathering yesterday--complete with egg dying! It was totally fun. For every egg we messed up, Tiff made us do a shot. I think I had about fifty of them! lol! Afterwards, we all went over to Karen's and hid the eggs. When she got home, we made her find them all. Her roommate eventually had to help her. lol...it was hilarious.

We were all going to see Grindhouse, but Tiff and Zack kind of got into a weird fight, so me and Karen just chilled at her place.

Today, my buddy at work finally gave me my laptop back--he assures me it is Tiff Virus Free!

Thank our risen god! hahah!

Passover...the Manni!

Last night, Dwayne & Wayne hosted a small Passover meal--complete with lots of mannischevitz (SP?). Karen's half Jewish so she lead me through most of the hard parts...and the food was soooo good. But there was WAY too much of it. Wayne really outdid himself this time!

This morning, my car wouldn't start for some damned reason. I told Karen that it's one of the 21st century plagues--along with the Tiff Virus! lol! Anyway, i got to work late and now i'm workin a little passed the bell because the office is closing down early for easter.

God bless us, every one!

Jack of All Blades of Glory

Last night, me and Kar went with Zack to see Blades of Glory. Tiff had to work late, which sucks bcause she would have died watching this with us. Will Farrell is so funny, i couldn't even breathe through most of it! He can do it all! He was always so good on SNL, but i really think he has found his calling with this movie! Napoleon Dynomite was funny, too, but will definitely stole the show.

Afterwards, we all met Tiff at Cat & Fiddle and I had some jacks & cokes. I'm not sure how she did it, but Tiff somehow got Karen to drink a little with us! It was cool because she's usually on teh straight & arrow, but she definitley was feeling good last night.

Work's been slow this week...i'm totally caught up and now just chillin here waiting for the 5 oclock bell to ring! lol!

March Sadness/April Drools

Over the weekend, me and Karen went over to Q's in Santa Monica with Zack, Tiff & Seth to watch the bruins get their asses fucking handed to them.

Man, it was a sad end to a great season, and the four of us drank our sorrows away (Thank God Karen was DD, right??) Even Tiff's one-liners couldn't make us laugh on Saturday. It really sucked--so disappointing.

On Sunday, Karen drove us up the PCH to have dinner with her friends Matt & Lisa. Karen's great and all, but her college friends are nothing like mine! It's funny to see people like Karen--just all calm and polite. I think Matt secretly is cool, though...he seemed to loosen up after I bought him a couple of shots out of eye-shot of the ladies. hahha!

Yesterday, we had off, so I just kind of lounged around the house and caught up on Tivo. My computer at home is still jacked from the Tiff Virus, so one of my buds at work is looking it over this week.

Sweet!